Yup. You read right. I have cancer for the third time.
Yesterday I began radio to zap the sh*t out of my new sarcoma squatter and although I don't have the energy now, I promise I’ll tell you the whole stupid, messy, heartbreaking and incredibly frustrating story soon.
Today I’m just writing to say hi, check in and share with you a few things I’ve found incredibly helpful to remember.
It’s been a while since I’ve been in the Cancer Land and I suppose I’d forgotten how bloody scary this place really is. Yesterday I thought about my funeral songs for quite a while, today I was convinced my stupid neck lump had spread into my jaw and was taking over my body. #drainer
This cancer crap haze that has snuck up on me and left me a little blinded this week but I've quickly remembered the things that help me through. I thought I’d share them with you in the hopes it might help anyone else going through their own shit storm.
Walks outside. Sometimes with people and sometimes by myself.
Power poses. Honestly, these have stopped me from falling apart in public for the last month. I used to use power poses to give me confidence for work presentations – now I use it to get through the scariest oncology appointments. And if you haven’t watched this TED talk by Amy Cuddy - book out your next 17 minutes.
Music. My siblings made me a play list filled with songs from our childhood, teenage years and now. Listening to that today made me smile for about 2 hours. I’ve got the playlist playing on loop now.
Writing. Sometimes the thoughts need to get out of your head and onto the paper. Lists, rants, reminders and sometimes wonderful thoughts.
Google the cancer, BUT ONLY ONCE. It’s unrealistic to tell cancer warriors not to google their diagnosis. It's like telling a dog not to smell its own poo. However, after spending one night torturing myself, I am making a rule not to do it again.
Social life. Energy is not infinite so learning to limit my social life has been a big one this week.
Hope it helps. And if you have any other tips – I’d love to hear them.